I had the honor to speak at The Church at Bushland on Mother’s Day.  I’d like to share with you today what the Lord gave me to say to their church body.  You can find the podcast here.

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2 Timothy 1:14  “Guard the good deposit that was entrusted to you – guard it with the help of the Holy Spirit who lives in us.”

1 John 2:15-17  “Do not love the world or anything in the world.  If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.  For everything in the world–the cravings of sinful man, the lust of the eyes and the boasting of what he has and does, comes not from the Father but from the world.  The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.”

1 John 1:5-7  “This is the message we have heard from him and declare: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.  If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth.  But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.”

2 Timothy 1:7  “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (or fear), but a spirit of power, love and of self-control.”

Hebrews 11:23  “By faith Moses’ parents hid him for three months after he was born, because they saw he was no ordinary child, and they were not afraid of the king’s edict.”

What are we afraid of?

It is my opinion that fear is one of the only, and certainly one of the strongest, tools of the enemy.  If He can make us afraid, he can render us powerless.  Our focus becomes the object of our fear and causes us to shrink back and be distracted from our calling or the callings placed on our children.

2 Timothy 1:7   “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity (or fear), but a spirit of power, love and of self-control.”

Fear is a spirit and it is a prophetic spirit…it tells you about the future or the future of your family and your children.  First of all, our enemy does not know our future.  He knows his because he can read about it!  But he does not know yours.

When we base our decisions about our children on the lies the spirit of fear tells us, we will be rendered impotent and powerless.

So where does he snare us?  What are we afraid of as moms, or as parents? 

• We are afraid of our children. How will they respond, are they going to rebel?  What if they hate me?

This spirit of fear has convinced us that:

• That all teenagers rebel.
• If you are too strict, you are just going to push them into doing the very thing you don’t want them to do.
• Your children, especially when they are teens, will not want anything to do with us.

All of those, not true.

• Not all teenagers rebel.  All kids make kid mistakes but the vast majority of them do not go hog wild.
• I am not talking about being strict or legalistic, but can I tell you that if you are allowing things in your home that you are uncomfortable with because you are afraid of how your children will respond if you set a standard…that is called blackmail.

We do not parent based on how our children will or will not respond.  Parenting is an act of worship and is directly tied to our relationship with the Lord.  When a situation happens, I go to the Lord, I do what He tells me to do.  The way my child responds is up to them and their relationship with Him.

If my daughter wants to date a young man, and we go to the Lord about it, Brian and I will base our decision on the direction of the Holy Spirit.  It has nothing to do with being strict, but we must not be blackmailed out of fear of our children’s responses into making decisions that are detrimental to our children and disobedient to the Lord.

The spirit of fear tells us over and over…when our children are teens, they will not want to spend time with us and they will really just want us to back off.

In the book, Rescue, I found out that teens actually want more interaction with their parents.

Society, and many voices, are screaming at them…with all different directives and temptations and just the time, that the fear that they don’t like us or want to hear from us, has convinced us to back way off.  They find themselves in the middle of chaotic onslaught and they can’t hear us screaming at them over the waves.

It is a lie…move in, fight to remain close to your children.

We are afraid of what other people will think.

The spirit of fear has us convinced that…

• Our friends will think that we are “those” parents.
• Our children will not have any friends if we don’t give them a cell phone in the 3^rd grade and let them have an Instagram account.

We cannot continue to look to the right or to the left to see how others are parenting and base our decisions off of them.

1 John 2:15-17  “Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.  For everything in the world – the cravings of sinful man, the lust of the eyes and the boasting of what he has and does, comes not from the Father but from the world.  The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.”

The truth is…

• First of all, who cares what your friends think of the decisions you are making in your home?  We experience peer pressure as much as our children do.  Do not be afraid to think for yourself.  Let your yes be yes and your no be no, know why you take the stands you do.  If it is because that is how the Lord is directing your family then stick to it.
• Your children will be better off if your decisions about technology, social media, and dating are based on your relationship with the Lord and His Word than Mr. Jones’ opinion across the street.

Finally, we are afraid that we are messing this up–that we don’t know how to do this mom, this dad, thing.

The spirit of fear whispers things like:

• Oh wow, what if your children were to find out about those things you’ve done in your past? How in the world can you set a higher standard for your children than you were able to keep at their age?
• You are even smart enough to help with 7^th grade homework, and you are the best these kids have for learning about life?
• You don’t trust yourself…why should they trust you?
• This is like the blind leading the blind here…you can see the direction you and your family should be heading any better than your 3 year old can.

1 John 1:5-7  “This is the message we have heard from him and declare: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.  If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth.  But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.”

God is light…and in Him there is no darkness at all.

So, you listen here, you spirit of fear, this is not the blind leading the blind…this in the once blind, but now fully sighted-child of the Most High God…one forgiven by the blood of Christ that purified me from all of my sin…walking in the light with Him.  And I see you for who you are…God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind!

Readers, please hear me when I say that from where I am sitting we are in the battle of our lifetime for our kids.  And fear has rendered us powerless and impotent.

I want to tell you what I see when I see you, mothers–you’re not a bunch of precious, silent, prude Mary Poppins.

• You are the guardian of dreams.

So until their hearts are strong enough to chase their dreams…you will be strong enough for the both of you.

• You are a carrier of hope.

“But hope that is seen is no hope at all.  Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have we wait for it patiently.” Romans 8:24 – 25

• You are a mentor and an example.

Your children watch you.  They see when difficulties arise and you keep your eyes on Christ.  They notice when you keep your word to a friend when it would have been easier to forget it.  They see you working hard to steer your family in the right direction.  They will follow you.

• You are a piece of their strength.

When your child faces adversity.  My sons wrestle and in a difficult wrestling match…it is hard for me to watch as they struggle and fight.  But one thing is for sure, no matter how hard it is for me, there will not be a match that he can’t find me.  You look right here, son, I am proud of you.  You are strong, you can do it.

• You give life.

Life and death is in the power of your tongue.  When your kids fall and get bruises and skinned knees, you are the voice saying let me help you up, let me dust you off…now you try again.

• You are a mirror.

You see things in your children that are too extraordinary for them to comprehend…you act as a mirror that reflects back to them the greatness that you see in them and you keep holding that mirror in front of them until they can see it themselves.

• You are their protector.

You will stand guard and you will come against every attack of the enemy that comes against them…you will continue to fight intense battles through prayer.

These descriptions do not sound to me like a flower pattern, corsage wearing, powerless, fearful woman…

Those descriptions sounds like a strong, competent, secure, powerful, bold, beautiful warrior for the Kingdom, and that, my dear sisters, is you!!!

My prayer for you, moms:  God, thank You that we are armed for battle…You have given us the sword of the Spirit, Your Word and Your favor protect us like a shield.  We are not afraid.  We are not afraid…. We will stand where You have called us to stand and we will be fierce in our protection of our children, we will be fierce in our love for you first, for our spouses, and for our children.  God, we are not silent and we are not weak because Your Holy Spirit is alive in us…Your Word is active in us.  God help us to stay submitted to the authorities You have placed over us, but Lord in Jesus’ name we will stand at our post.  We will fight the battles that come our way and we will take ground for Your Kingdom.  The enemy will not have our families, he will not have our marriages and he will not have our children.  The battle is Yours and we need only to stand, but for Pete’s sake, we will stop denying there is a battle and we will wield our sword.  Make us strong, alert, fully awake, and dangerous to the enemy.  You are the Victor…we are honored to come alongside of You and humbled You would allow us to.  Make us different.  In the mighty name of Jesus, Amen.

My love,