Recently, I had the privilege of working with a phenomenal group of college students.  I have told you about them before.  We sometimes refer to them as the Lifeguards.  One of the questions that we asked the group was, “What do you consider to be the biggest struggle for students who fall in the 12 – 17 year old age group?”

Here are their responses:

• Identity
• Comparison
• Sexual temptation
• Self-image (appearance)
• Fitting in

I am not saying that all teens should be forbidden to engage in social media because that is simply unrealistic.  However, balance and boundaries are imperative.   On average teens spend over 7 hours each day participating in social media and the internet.  How and when did we as a culture decide that this kind of fixation or addiction should be considered permissible or normal?
We have young ladies struggling with their own self-image because they are reading the high points of their peers’ lives in a Facebook stream.  Everyone’s life looks more perfect and glamorous on their twitter feed than it does in real life.  Young men are posting videos and comments about their sexual encounters with young women and photos and videos of teens drinking and partying are commonplace.  Social media has taken the regrettable, embarrassing moments experienced by teens of 15 years ago in the presence of 20 people at a party and magnified it into a humiliating display for literally millions.  These images can and will come back to haunt them.    Universities and employers often research a person’s social media accounts before granting admittance or offering a position.  Can you fathom the implications of that?

There is simply no substitute for spending time together as a family.  Make memories together.  Time goes so quickly.  I want to savor every moment I have with my family.  I remember sitting on the couch last Christmas with Jake and Madi and realizing I have 6 more Christmases with Madi living our home and only 4 with Jake.  As a mom, I am simply not willing to give over all the priceless time I have with my children to be consumed by Facebook and a cell phone.

What ever happened to enjoying the great outdoors or family dinners at the table?  I am not sure where the appreciations for those types of things have gone, but I am quite sure that we as a society would do well to find them.

If you are going to allow your teen to use social media, you need to have access to all of their passwords and logins.  You would be wise to look at the pages of their friends as well.  You won’t have to look far to see what takes place in their world.  As my favorite president, Ronald Reagan once said, “Don’t be afraid to see what you see.”

Here is program to help you track social media. You link your children’s accounts to it and the program will send you reports on risky behavior and flags inappropriate language. Obviously having access to your child’s account would eliminate the need for this, but you may find this helpful. http://www.socialshield.com

My prayer is always that you and your family will have a bond with one another that will last a lifetime.  I pray that you are raising a generation of world changers who understand temperance, boundaries and responsibility.

My love,